If there’s no right or wrong answer, how do you choose?
A yoga teacher posed the question in class recently, and it struck a chord with me. I wanted to call a client and put her on speaker so she could listen.
She’s grappling with a difficult decision—whether to stay in her great job or leave it to start her own business. If she stays where she is, she’ll inherit the company down the road, but it’s not running the way she’d like it to right now. Starting her own business means she can do what she wants, but she won’t have the support system of her current setup.
It’s tough, but her options aren’t really a matter of right or wrong—they’re simply different.
I just want to do what’s right. I don’t want to make the wrong choice.
Like my client, I’ve thought these things, and I’m sure you have, too. But for the most part, our life decisions aren’t about right vs. wrong. (Thankfully! Can you imagine how stressful that would be?) Our choices and opportunities usually have both benefits and drawbacks. When we acknowledge that we’re not really making a decision between good and evil, taking that next step becomes exponentially easier.
Here’s what happens when you realize there’s no right or wrong answer:
You get “unstuck.” It’s not unusual to feel frozen when you’re faced with a tough decision. That’s usually because you want to make the “perfect” choice. When you acknowledge that “perfect” doesn’t exist—that no matter what you choose, there will be pros and cons—you free yourself up to think more clearly. You’ll likely feel less pressure, which will only help as you weigh your options.
It’s easier to gut-check. Listening to your intuition becomes easier if you’re willing to buy into the no-right-or-wrong mentality. My client has had some strong gut instincts pop up recently, and I encouraged her not to dismiss them, letting her gut be her guide for making the decision that feels right for her. Sometimes, it really is that simple.
You free up time. Back when I worked in the nonprofit world, my organization was gifted a camera. We got to choose the model we wanted, and my colleague asked me to weigh in. I gave my answer within minutes, and he quickly came over to dissect my thought process. He ended up spending a lot of time and energy trying to choose that camera, and frankly, any of our options would’ve worked just fine. Imagine how much time he could’ve saved if he realized there was no right or wrong choice. Imagine how much time you could save.
I love that when we realize there’s no right or wrong decision, we gain the courage to take a stance and move forward.
How can you apply this to a decision you’re stalling to make? If there isn’t a right or wrong, what would you choose? Tell me so I can root for you.
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